Being interrupted is an old frustration. Around 180 BCE, the Jewish teacher Ben Sira wrote down some advice that still sounds current: "Answer not before thou hast heard the cause: neither interrupt men in the midst of their talk" (Sirach 11:8, King James Version).

Conversation also moves fast. In a study of question-and-answer exchanges across 10 languages, replies tended to come quickly, with little overlap. When turns change that fast, two people can easily start at once (Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, 2009).

Some interruptions are collisions like that. Others are a habit of talking over people. Emotionally intelligent people tend to notice the difference and respond in a way that keeps their place in the conversation without starting a fight. Here are eight phrases that can help.

1. "I'm almost done. Hold that thought?"

A lot of interruptions come from enthusiasm. Someone has a related story, a question or an objection, and they can't wait to share it.

In that situation, there's no need to stop or to make a point of it. A light "I'm almost done. Hold that thought?" lets you finish while signaling that you want to hear what they have to say.

Tone matters here. Said warmly, with a smile or a small raised hand, it reads as an invitation to wait rather than a rebuke.

Then keep the promise. When you finish, turn back to them: "Sorry, you were going to say something?" People are much more willing to wait when they can see their turn really is coming.

2. "Hear me out, and then tell me what you think."

Plutarch tells a story about the Athenian general Themistocles before the Battle of Salamis. Themistocles was arguing against the plan of the fleet's commander, Eurybiades, who tried to shut him down: "Themistocles, at the games those who start too soon get a caning." When Themistocles kept going, Eurybiades raised his staff as though to strike him. "Smite, but hear me," Themistocles replied. According to Plutarch, Eurybiades "was struck with admiration at his calmness, and bade him speak" (Life of Themistocles 11, Bernadotte Perrin's translation).

Few interruptions come with a raised staff. But the same pattern happens when someone dismisses an idea before you've finished explaining it.

"Hear me out, and then tell me what you think" asks for the full picture without asking for agreement. It also tells the other person their turn is coming.

3. "Fair challenge. Can we take turns?"

In Plato's Gorgias, Socrates is in the middle of questioning Gorgias when the younger Polus bursts in to accuse him of bad manners. Socrates welcomes the challenge. "If I and Gorgias are stumbling, here are you who should raise us up," he says, and he offers "to retract any error into which you may think that I have fallen," on one condition: that Polus give up the long speeches and, "in your turn ask and answer" (Gorgias 461b-462a, Benjamin Jowett's translation).

Socrates took the interruption's content seriously while setting terms for how the conversation would go. Sometimes the person who cuts in has a good point.

"Fair challenge. Can we take turns?" acknowledges the point and asks for a fair exchange. It works especially well in debates, meetings and family discussions where everyone wants the floor at once.

4. "I want to hear your point. Can I finish mine first?"

In the first book of Plato's Republic, the sophist Thrasymachus had "made an attempt to get the argument into his own hands" several times and been "put down by the rest of the company, who wanted to hear the end." When a pause finally came, "he could no longer hold his peace," and, Socrates says, "he came at us like a wild beast, seeking to devour us" (Republic 1.336b, Benjamin Jowett's translation).

Socrates admits he was shaken. He says he steadied himself by looking at Thrasymachus directly, and answered gently: "don't be hard upon us" (336e). Plato's Socrates was often ironic, and some of that reply probably was. But a calm answer still works when it's sincere.

When someone keeps trying to cut in because they're worked up, arguing about who has the floor usually makes things worse. "I want to hear your point. Can I finish mine first?" tells them they'll get their turn and makes your request clear, without guessing at how they feel.

5. "That's a separate point. Let me finish this one first."

The Book of Proverbs has a blunt line on jumping to conclusions: "He that answereth a matter before he heareth it, it is folly and shame unto him" (Proverbs 18:13, King James Version).

Some interruptions are really predictions. The other person assumes they know where you're going and starts responding to it. Sometimes they've guessed right, and sometimes they've jumped to a different conclusion entirely.

If they've guessed right, there's no need to pretend otherwise: "Yes, that's where I'm headed. Let me explain why." If they've jumped somewhere else, "That's a separate point. Let me finish this one first" keeps the two issues from getting tangled.

6. "Sorry, we both started at once. You go ahead."

Not every interruption is one-sided. Because turns change so quickly in conversation, two people sometimes start talking at the same moment.

When that happens, there's no need to compete. "Sorry, we both started at once. You go ahead" gives the floor away gracefully and costs very little.

Once they've finished, it's easy to come back in: "Can I add something to that?" Yielding once doesn't mean giving up your turn for good.

7. "Before we move on, I'd like to finish my last point."

Sometimes an interruption doesn't just cut you off. It takes the conversation somewhere else entirely, and before long everyone is discussing a different topic.

This happens often in meetings, where an unfinished point can quietly disappear. If it matters, it's reasonable to bring it back before the group moves too far on: "Before we move on, I'd like to finish my last point."

Keep the return short. Summarize where you were in a sentence, finish the thought, and then hand the conversation back. For example: "Before we move on, I'd like to finish my last point. I was saying the deadline is tight because two people are away next week. That's all I needed to add."

Said plainly, it doesn't sound like a complaint about being interrupted. It sounds like someone making sure an important detail isn't lost.

8. "Could you give me a moment to finish next time?"

A single interruption is usually worth letting go. A pattern is different. If the same person regularly talks over you, a private conversation tends to work better than correcting them in front of others.

Make it specific: "In today's meeting, I got cut off twice while explaining the timeline. Could you give me a moment to finish next time?" Describe what happened rather than labeling the person, and leave room for their side.

They may not have noticed. The 2009 study found that languages differed somewhat in the average gap between turns, and habits can differ between families and workplaces too. What feels like rudeness to one person can feel like normal, lively conversation to another.

Sometimes the interruption is worth it

Not every interruption needs a response. If someone cuts in with urgent information, a question that clears up confusion or because they're upset, letting them speak is often the kind and sensible choice.

It also helps to check your own habits. Many people interrupt more than they realize, especially when they're excited or anxious. If you hear yourself doing it, a quick "Sorry, go on" repairs the moment.

One place to start

Choose one phrase from this list that suits the situation you face most, whether that's a meeting, a dinner table or a phone call.

The next time someone cuts in, use it once, calmly, and notice whether you get your turn back. Then make sure they get theirs.